Wordia blog

This week I’m going to attempt to write the blog with the theme of crap Christmas Cracker jokes as we’re hoping to see Santa come down our chimney and are currently discussing if we’re leg or breast men – turkey wise of course. So first up out of our yuletide wordia cracker:

First up: what do you get if you cross a star with a sailor? A hugely successful indie band of course! Following massive success in the early and mid noughties Starsailor have been a bit quiet of late. But here at Wordia we’ve learnt that it’s only really because like every other band in the known universe they’ve decided to leave EMI. They are back with a bang in a few months time with a new album on the Virgin label. We caught up with lead singer James Walsh on the cusp of his big comeback. For a man who regularly performs in front of thousands he was remarkably softly spoken, but unsurprisingly eloquent with a lyrical quality to his turn of phrase. Watch out for his endearing videos coming soon.

Next is more of a riddle than a joke. Can you guess the real names of up and coming double act Bronya and Siony? Honda and Sammi? Inge and Hermione? No – it’s Sonya and Briony, who have made the almost double bluff of protecting their anonymity by merely switching the first letters of their Christian names. Could they be the next French and Saunders? Quite possibly on the evidence of the definitions they gave us. Word play is really their forte so they were perfect for wordia.

It just wouldn’t be Christmas without a knock knock joke in a cracker. So in that spirit try this one: Knock knock. Who’s there? Dungeon. Dungeon who? Dungeon know that we went to the London Dungeon this week! Your correspondent hadn’t been to the spooky attraction since he was in short trousers and didn’t recall it being particularly alarming. But in the interim period they’ve really upped the ante and it actually ended up being quite scary. They’ve got real rats you know! We were escorted round by the PR lady and the actor we were filming with and to avoid bumping into the paying public we kept on having to walk up and down a bit of the dungeon known as plague street. One of the main features in that area is a mannequin dressed as a plague victim which, when triggered by a sensor, sneezes a mist of water (hopefully!) at hapless passers by. You know in Indiana Jones and the Last crusade when having seen a useless Nazi decapitated Indy knows how to time his run just right so he avoids the slashing blades of the booby traps protecting the Holy Grail. Well in this case the PR lady and the actor (being seasoned pros) were the Indys and we were the useless Nazis – getting hosed in the face by the sneezing dummy on no less than three occasions.

Finally in site news ‘Illustration’ by Quentin Blake is still number one on the wordia chart. If you’ve found a definition you think can beat it make sure you rate it at the end of your viewing of it so it races up the chart to challenge for the top spot.

A very happy Christmas to you all and as always, keep it wordia.